Your Purple Prose Just Gives You Away

[youtube=http://youtube.com/watch?v=GpPR9pN_49s]

From: Ralph
Sent: Wednesday, July 09, 2008 3:56 PM
To: Alan
Subject: diarrhea

Colmes it’s beyond belief the way you interrupt shouting over them
As they try to speak, only one that is crude, rude, ill mannered, a Slime ball. A dirt bag, you belong and would feel at home at the bottom of a Cess-pool that is used by people with extreme diarrhea

Ralph

From: SHERRY
Sent: Wednesday, July 09, 2008 8:35 PM
To: Alan
Subject: you make me angry

Alain,
You make me angry sometimes. Sherry

From: Alan
Sent: Wednesday, July 09, 2008 10:58 PM
To: Sherry
Subject: RE: you make me angry

I’m terribly terribly sorry that you have to be subjected to my views.

From: Janet
Sent: Thursday, July 10, 2008 8:57 AM
To: Alan
Subject: constructive criticism……

You are an idiot, stupid and uneducated. A perfect description of a clown, with the makeup, the one witchy eyebrow that replaces the large red nose. You express exaggerated actions of a coarse, ill-bred person; a boor, you are disgustingly offensive to the Fox guest, you are loathsome, sickening, nauseous, repulsive, revolting, repugnant, abhorrent and detestable. The very sad part in all of this, is that you are using up our fresh air. The person who you married must be a dog of all dogs. Clean-up your act, take some lessons from Hannity, and be accountable for the air you breathe and for God sakes please don’t clutter up the earth with any of your off-springs.

Janet

From: Alan
Sent: Thursday, July 10, 2008 11:40 AM
To: Janet
Subject: RE: constructive criticism……

This is very helpful and constructive. Especially helpful are your educational comments about my wife and your reproductive advice. Thank God there are people like you who can help be grow as a human being.

From: John
Sent: Thursday, July 10, 2008 8:07 AM
To: Alan
Subject: Pets

Sean said you had a rat for a pet. That wasn’t nice, to rats! In fact,
the rats have you for a pet.

Do you know the difference between a Democrat and a catfish? One is a bottom dwelling, scum sucker. The other is a fish.

John

Here is my very insulted dog, Banjin, AKA Bonnie

From: Curtis
Sent: Thursday, July 10, 2008 9:45 PM
To: Alan
Subject:

Alan

You don’t have any balls of your own – you would follow anything that had a jackass stamped on it’s forehead whether it is a him, her, or it’s!!!!!

Curtis

From: Skip
Sent: Friday, July 11, 2008 9:20 PM
To: Alan
Subject: Military service

What branch of the service were you in and when? I doubt you ever served this country. You are the most obstonate impolite person I have ever had the misfortune of hearing. Stop butting in with your snide remarks while someone is speaking. Thank God for my mute button

From: Alan
Sent: Friday, July 11, 2008 10:31 PM
To: Skip
Subject: RE: Military service

Does the right to free speech and the right to offer an opinion differ for those who were not in the military? Do you mind that the Vice President was not in the military or that President Bush didn’t show up for his physical when he was in the National Guard? When pro-war conservatives never served do you question their service?

From: William
Sent: Friday, July 11, 2008 9:50 PM
To: Alan
Subject: Compliments

Mr. Colmes,

When anyone comes on Hannity and Colmes with any brains at all, they make you sound like a bungling idiot which your are for sure!

William

From: Mark
Sent: Friday, July 11, 2008 9:55 PM
To: Alan
Subject: Being stupid on national tv

Allen,

Here’s a thought; I know you’d give Obama a Wollinsky on national tv given a chance. We all apprciate the fact you and Barack love each other. Swell! But, when you have guests on your show, especially Republicans, when they are given a chance to make a point, do you think you could shut your cake hole long enough for them to do that?

Mark

From: Alan
Sent: Friday, July 11, 2008 11:00 PM
To: Mark
Subject: RE: Being stupid on national tv

Obama and I are only still getting to know each other. We’re not at the “Wollinsky” stage yet. And, when that happens, we’ll do it in private.

From: Larry
Sent: Friday, July 11, 2008 10:06 PM
To: Alan
Subject: Hey!

Allen,

I would love to be a guest on the show so I could bitch slap you on national TV.

Larry

From: Alan
Sent: Friday, July 11, 2008 11:02 PM
To: Larry
Subject: RE: Hey!

Larry,

That would show what a real man you are.

From: Chuck
Sent: Friday, July 11, 2008 10:12 PM
To: Alan
Subject: Get RID of Colmes ! ! !

Fox News:

Alan Colmes is not just the ‘liberal view’ of Hannity & Colmes, he is a discourteous and illegal advocate for Democratic candidates. He can’t wait to get ‘his turn’, (“its my turn to talk”, “its my turn to talk”….”) to interview the guest(s). Then he gives HIS VIEWS and walks-all-over any guest that disagrees. His ‘fast talk’ to ‘drown-out’ the guest’s views comes across on TV as a garbled MESS. DUMP HIM for a liberal like Kirstin Powers. The show ratings would SOAR, (and Alan will find his “radio” show going down the toilet along with his TV UNemployment). Chuck

From: WF
Sent: Friday, July 11, 2008 10:29 PM
To: Alan
Subject: You deserve a raise

Allen,

Go directly into the boss’s office, pound your fists on the desk and DEMAND a raise! Explain to the boss that you appear on Fox News on a daily basis and defend some of he most bizarre, outrageous, undefeatable, and ridiculous points of view imaginable. Then explain that if you’re expected to continue, you want a BIG raise. Tell the boss that you’re simply tired of being exposed as a target for public ridicule

From: Bruce
Sent: Saturday, July 12, 2008 12:18 AM
To: Alan
Subject: Your hair…

alan, get a haircut,

By: Alan

Alan Colmes is the publisher of Liberaland.